Motivation

From Cure Magazine's article

This morning, Mara Eve Robbins posted a poem I wrote a year ago on my personal Facebook wall. It needs editing, but it hit home. The poem was about a comparison between my mother and myself, about death, and about the forty pair of shoes my mother left behind. It's been a little over ten months since mom died, and the last pair of her shoes left her closet on April 4. My daughter and I packed them into the car for the trek back home. Then, my daughter and husband piled themselves into the car and left me with dad.

Yep, I'm back in the caregiving saddle again.

Mara's post also hit home, because it was just a year ago that I took off with her to stay at her house in Floyd, Virginia for Easter weekend. Did I realize it was Easter weekend at the time? No. Something has happened to my thinking over the past three years that disabled my ability to connect with the rest of the world. Except for Christmas, holidays don't seem to exist.

And, it's Poetry Month, and I'm not writing poetry. I haven't written anything in the memoir, either. I haven't written my blogs or anything else other than work for a  new client. While I can use that client work for an excuse, I think, frankly, that I just needed a break.

Darrell Laurent, long-time columnist for the Lynchburg newspaper and author of several books, wrote something this morning in his public Facebook Group, The Writers' Bridge. He wrote:

"Losing our motivation is part of the larger creative process. We wouldn't have the bursts of inspiration and productivity without the difficult creative dips. 

"When we lose our creative steam, not only does our writing come to a crawl, but we also start feeling low about ourselves. 

"For example, when you aren't writing, the feeling that you should be working nags at the back of your mind. This tension creates further stagnation and deepens the creative funk."

Some tips he provided included 1) Honoring the rest period; 2) recommit; and 3) talk about your work...among others. Those three points stuck with me.

Since I don't believe in coincidence, I honor the fact that Mara posted that poem and that Darrell posted that article. They both motivated me to blow through this fog and get something down in writing.

And, now that I've started, it seems the flood gates are opening in my head. There's just so much...so much.

Two major events happened recently regarding the book. Denise Brown at Caregiving and I had another little blog chat, this time about marriage (and the marriage, btw, is doing much better). That 1/2 hour discussion is available at Blog Talk Radio.

The other issue is the article in Cure Magazine about caregiving. I'm not sure why they have me in that article, because it opens with me, but doesn't go anywhere with me. The initial article was much more involved. But, they had a photographer come out to my town to take a photo, so I guess they felt compelled to use it. As a result, I have a speaking engagement in Louisville in August. This is a good thing.

Last, but not least, I'm been somewhat gainfully employed by Merchant Negotiators since January. I have conducted a lot of writing and research for that company over the past few months leading up to that site's "going live" this past week. Once again, I'm writing about financial issues. If I ever win the lottery, I know a lot about how to manage those winnings!

As for dad -- he's doing fine. He's actually doing great. I just needed to validate that information for myself. More about him later at my blog on Caregiving.com.

A Warm Welcome to the Blog Party!

Young woman decorates the Christmas tree, painting by Marcel Rieder (1862-1942) from 1898

A warm welcome for all my new visitors (and old friends as well). Today marks the beginning of the Caregiving.com's Fifth Annual Holiday Progressive Blog Party, and I'm one happy participant! Throughout the week of December 7, you can stop by the blogs of family caregivers and drop off holiday well-wishes and good cheer. This year, the party also includes companies that provides services and/or products to help family caregivers.

1. Be sure to stop by each site during the week. The sites are listed at Caregiving.com.
2. When you stop by, share a comment and let the blogger know you’re visiting because of CareGiving.com’s Holiday Progressive Blog Party.
3. Be sure to stop by that page at Caregiving.com regularly, as more participants may be added as the week goes by.

I was happy to be able to donate a prize for this party -- an invisibility cloak. Everyone (caregivers especially) would love a chance to become invisible every once in a while, I believe. Put on that cloak (provided by Cat at her Etsy shop -- if you don't win this cape, you can purchase one from Cat!).

Welcome, welcome, welcome. I hope you can stay a while...

Blog Parties and Invisibility Cloaks

The silver "invisibility" or "superhero" cape -- perfect for caregivers for the holidays!

If you've followed me on Twitter, Facebook, or here at the blog, you know that Thanksgiving sucked for me. But, I recovered nicely, mainly because I was grateful that dad had a great time with his friends. Plus, my brother called, and -- despite my initial nausea over the smell of my husband's turkey -- that meat sure was good on a sandwich.

Next up -- the "real" holidays. Christmas, Boxing Day, Hanukkah, whatever individuals celebrate during December. I'm dreading the upcoming holidays and all the traditions that go with them. In a discussion with other caregivers and family members who lost their loved ones this past year to bile duct cancer, one woman said, "Christmas will even be worse" than Thanksgiving. I thought, "Wow -- I don't know if I want to project that far ahead," but then another woman agreed that the holidays will be worse, and then another woman agreed...

So, maybe Christmas will be worse than Thanksgiving, but I'm going to do everything I possibly can to reverse that direction for myself. Someone else asked if it was acceptable to be "peacefully inactive" for the holidays. Of course! Even more so, it would be wonderful if caregivers could become invisible. Just for a few hours, maybe, or a day...and, in the right situation, maybe for an entire week through New Year. What if we could wear an invisibility cloak that could serve us throughout the entire year when needed?

So I went hunting for an invisibility cloak and I found one at an Etsy shop based in England. This cape is not for me, however. I'm giving it away through Caregiving.com's upcoming Caregiving Holiday Blog Party. I've posted a link for this event in the right column on this site. If you cannot see that red background photo, please let me know and just use the link in this paragraph. Those links can take you to the event page to learn more about how to win this cape and at least five other prizes during the week between December 7th and 13th.

Many thanks to Cat and her to her Etsy invisibility capabilities! I'm excited about providing a caregiver with a way to become invisible anytime he or she wants. What a great gift, period, for any caregiver!

The Holidays for Caregivers

What will Christmas be like without mom? I'm about to find out, with support from the folks at Caregiving.com...

The holidays will never be the same after a death of someone close to you. Even if that person got under your skin, something in you will expect that irritation -- especially during the holidays. That voice! Will it stay in your head forever?

On the other hand, the loss can be overwhelming. Not only is a loved one gone, but your life has changed. Forever. There's no pulling a cat out of a hat on that one. What are you feeling now? Rage? Frustration? Guilt?

No matter what you're feeling (if you survived Thanksgiving, that is), you might find comfort in the holiday survival articles posted at Caregiving.com. The "Attitudes on Platitudes" gave me my first laugh-out-loud moment yesterday. "Bah Humbug? A True Tale of Christmas" showed me how I have the power to alter my holiday traditions to make a new history for myself and my family. "Ten Signs an Aging Relative Needs Help" helped me decide if my remaining parent needs help or if I need help...(reading halfway through the list made me realize I'm in dire straits!).

I invite you to snoop around at Caregiving.com to see if this site fits your needs. I know, while caregiving, that little time is spent on what the caregiver needs or wants...and it takes time to commit to dedicating yourself to a group of individuals who may really understand you and care about you...but, hey. During the holidays, it might be just what you need.

Membership is free. Just join us. Now.