Contest!

Friday marks the beginning of a new phase in my project campaign. This time YOU can receive monetary benefits from a merit-based referral contest. This contest is designed to increase contributions to my project, and you can also win a gift credit card to use as you wish.

1. I'll provide one $100 VISA card to the person who brings in the most contributors to my campaign at any level, no matter the dollar amount. For instance, if you have 500 contributors at $1, you could win this prize for your efforts.
2. I'll provide a second $100 gift credit VISA card to the person who brings in the highest dollar amount, no matter the number of contributors. For instance, if you bring in one contributor at $1,000, you could win this prize for your efforts.
3. Finally, I'll provide a $50 gift credit card to the person who brings in the the most referrals, period. You deserve a prize for working so hard! For instance, if you bring in 550 referrals, but none of them contribute, you can still obtain this card

To learn more, visit the Contest Page on this blog (listed in right-hand column). NOTE: Only one prize per person, so at least three people must compete for all prizes to be awarded for your efforts.

Still Time to Compete...

This is a screenshot of the leader board on the dashboard on Saturday at 2pm. I didn't post on Friday, because it appeared nothing has changed over the past week except a few names and the fact that I brought in more money (and I'm not competing). So, you still have plenty of time to sign up and gain interest -- view the referral contest information and follow the rules to win by November 24th.

Memoir Progress Update

One rebuilt garden bed with new mulch!

The support I've received for this project so far has been wonderful. As of this writing, 43 individuals provided $1,184. This is enough money for me to pay expenses incurred during this campaign, to pay for an editor, and to pay for two days at a four-day poetry retreat in November with the Green River Writers to edit a few poems that are going into the memoir. I plan to get a lot done in those two days.

Next up -- paying for a month or two in seclusion to finish the memoir. Just to be perfectly clear, this time does not exclude regular work for clients. Instead, it is to finance travel to one of several writers' retreats (if I'm chosen), or to pay for a getaway from the chaos at home to have quiet time to finish my research and writing. My family WANTS me to leave to finish this project, so help them out! =)

In other news:

• This is my last week at dad's house. I've finished weeding and separating the flowers in mom's garden beds (all ten of them), weeded along the fence and around the trees, and had mulch delivered for the front beds. The mulch for the back beds is arriving after I leave. I used mom's new garden gloves that she purchased before she died and never used, and I poked holes in the ends of the fingers. Dad said, "I'm sure she won't mind." Despite my initial fears over tackling my mother's gardens, I think I did fine by her.
• Packing to return home includes items from around the house that dad wants me to sell. I have to put on my "impersonal" persona when conducting this work, because I feel as though I'm selling memories. On the other hand, it feels great to downsize, and I'm conducting this activity on the homefront as well so I can relieve my daughter from this task upon my death. I never realized I inherited my "hoarder gene" from mom. I've learned since mom's death how to hide that hoarding (in drawers, closets, and the attic!). I'll post more items to my Etsy shop (GoinOriginals) next week. Sending a "thank you" to my new customers at that venue!
• It appears no one has really taken me up on the contest challenge yet. Too bad! But, there's still time to compete (until November 24th!).
• It appears that folks are taking me up on my $1 birthday wish challenge at the Cancer, Caregiving, Contentious Love Indiegogo site! Wonderful! Those dollar bills add up! (hint for those who want to compete in the previously mentioned challenge -- I'm trying to help you!)
• Thanks again to Denise at Caregiving.com for offering a new space to blog about my caregiving adventures with dad. Latest post: My Fears About Leaving Dad Alone.

Since I'm busy packing and traveling over the next two days, I won't be posting anything here until Friday. Be good, take care, and be happy if you can. <3

Initial Referral Contest Leader Board

This is a screenshot of the leader board on the dashboard at 12:01 a.m. (yes, I was one minute late due to slow Internet issues). I'll post the leader board again on Friday, October 31 in the morning. You have plenty of time to sign up and gain interest -- view the referral contest information and follow the rules to win!

PS -- I'm not a contestant. =)

Some People Who Support the Arts

I'm also a fine artist; but my writing is, at the moment, far more important to me, because I feel I have a story to share that can help other caregivers. I created this oil pastel in 2007 after a visit to the Bahamas as a professor's assistant for an archaeology project on San Salvador.

It's time to catch up on all the thank you notes for folks who have supported my Indiegogo project since October 13th. I look at Indiegogo fundraisers that bring in thousands of dollars, and I realize that they're for tech products. Then, I look at Indiegogo fundraisers for the arts, and we all lag behind those tech products by thousands of dollars. Therefore, I'm so very grateful to the individuals listed below, because they see value in my ability to tell a story. They are investing in my art -- that art of memoir.

• I'm grateful to my film/documentary maker friend, Jacques Laurent. I met Jacques when he arrived in La Grange from France to film the trains that run through the town. We have been friends since, and I'm grateful that he's my first overseas supporter! (I have supporters in Canada, too -- not forgetting you! <3).
• I'm grateful to the anonymous donor who decided to support me in a huge way. Much love and many, many <3!
• I'm grateful for Amy Wellborn's support. This fine artist thanked me in person one day for my gratitude lists. I was overwhelmed, because it's rare that someone in this world will make time to thank someone in person. I'm guilty of that same lack of support for some of my friends. Love you, Amy!
• I'm so grateful to Kristi Weber, who will always be one of my favorite poets. We met in April this year during Robert Lee Brewer's Poem-A-Day challenge, and I remain sufficiently charmed by her attitude, perspective, and downright solidness in being herself. She supported me the day after she learned she finally had a job -- now, that's digging deep. <3 to you, Kristi.
• Gratitude to my long-time friend Sharon Jones -- an artist I met when living down south -- for her support. She could have bought me a rum and coke, but chose instead to support my art. Big thanks! =)
• So grateful to Ursula Powers for her support. We've known each other since the BP Gulf Oil disaster, where we tweeted against BP. Power to the people, especially through the family business, Al's Bees!
• Thanks to my buddy, Joe Davenport, for wanting so badly to push me to that $1K mark that he donated twice! You're a winner, Joe. Thanks for your support!

I also want to thank Denise at Caregiving.com for personally welcoming me into her space and offering a new channel to blog. This time, I'm blogging about the switch from being caregiver for my mother to realizing that I'm now my dad's caregiver (thanks to Denise's insight). Denise is a bright and energetic soul who is sincerely interested in all her Caregiving members. My blog, Linda's Blog, is located under "Caregiving for Parents."

Many thanks, too, to Mary Beth at Caregivers for Home. She approached me via Twitter to ask if she could write about my experience and memoir, and then asked if I would write a guest blog. Well, yes! Mary Beth's article is When Doctor’s RX is: No Hope, A Caregiver’s Journey. My article, which broaches a topic that I had to write about sooner or later. Yes, I shared this story with my husband before it was published -- Marriage and Caregiving: Letting Go, A Daughter’s Story.

So grateful to be meeting new friends and supporters in my quest to fund my art and I'm grateful to friends who have stepped up to share. If you want to fund my memoir as well, you can contribute as little as $1 or as much as you want at Cancer, Caregiving, and Contentious Love's Indiegogo campaign. A heads up on Friday -- YOU can win money by helping to spread my campaign through linkage. Learn more about my Referral Contest and, if you have questions, feel free to contact me through Twitter or Facebook. 

Time to Give Thanks

I haven't thanked anyone since my October 1 post, where I thanked many artist, writer, poet, musician, and photography friends for their monetary, emotional, and physical support. So, a quick post today to catch up on all those individuals who have stepped up since the beginning of the month...

First, a huge thank you and gratitude to the authors, editors, and publishers who read my memoir excerpt and offered their words of praise and encouragement: Many thanks to Mara Eve Robbins, Kim Jacobs, Janeson Keeley, S. E. Ingraham, and Tony Acree. I've posted their reviews on this site.

If you're a blogger, author, editor, or publisher and you'd like to write a (hopefully positive) review of this memoir's excerpt, don't hesitate to contact me via Twitter or Facebook.

Now for the donors!

• Who can write a book without the support of her family? Thanks to my husband, Hugh, my daughter, Cora, and her boyfriend, Will, for their monetary encouragement! They dug deep for this effort, trust me. That's what makes their gifts all that much more awesome. <3
• Thanks again to Tony Acree, as he not only partially dedicated his last book to me (The Watchers), but he wrote a review AND he wants an eBook. You know how to be a fan, Tony -- thanks!
• Vicki Bironas, owner of Fire It Up Studio in La Grange, KY, stepped up to be the first business to support my memoir. Thanks to her generous $150 gift, her shop name and location will go in the print and eBook editions of the memoir. Vicki  - MWHA! One of my best besties. 
• To my friend, Tess Elliott -- thank you for your monetary support and your encouragement. I love, especially that you comment on almost every post I write and like just about every post I contribute to my Facebook page. You're a gem, Tess. Tess is an artist and a photographer who creates toy theaters, and who is insanely in love with puppetry and art in general.
• Thank you, Melissa Crites, for your support! Melissa is the owner of Serenity Studio, LLC in La Grange, KY, and I can guarantee you that she is a superb massage therapist. She's also an artist with a focus on painting some beautiful gourds.
• Another La Grange business owner, Sue Ann Birchfield, owner of Rainy Day Resale, stepped up to support my project, too. If you'll notice at her website, her resale business is top notch and upscale -- drool-worthy, actually. =)
• And, thanks to my dear friend Joe Davenport for his support. He's been a huge supporter for a long time, to the extent that he actually dressed up like Elvis for an event I created. Joe, you're the best. <3
• Many thanks to Dr. Nurit Israeli , a psychologist and psychology professor in NY, but also a wonderful poet. Of course, that's how I met Nurit -- as a poet -- and she's an extraordinary wordsmith and observer of life. I'm so honored to have your company on this journey, Nurit!
• Then, there are the anonymous supporters. Anonymous to you, that is...I know who they are, because Indiegogo provides that information for me. I think they know how much I appreciate them, too. Much love!
• Finally, I have a supporter to thank who may not show up on the campaign site, depending upon if we can work it out. John Manning is a friend, a dance partner, a banker, and a hoot. He wants his name in the book, so we're working that out. I'm honored.

That's right --  you can contact me directly if you don't want to use your credit card or display your name or whatever is keeping you from using the Indiegogo Cancer, Caregiving, Contentious Love site. If you want to support my efforts, let me know. I'll be happy to help.

Supporting the Arts & Letters

This is the trailer for Afterthoughts by Lynn Tincher, produced by Dark Palette Productions

I love to support artists. I have supported many writers, musicians, videographers, other authors, poets, crafters, and actors over the years, and it's been my pleasure. Often, the payback is unexpected, like when local author Tony Acree dedicated his latest book, The Watchers, to another local author, Lynn Tincher, and me. What a gift! All I did was tell him to quit editing and keep writing (advice that is difficult for me to follow, by the way -- I was throwing down the gauntlet!).

That's why I'm supporting two artists I know from the get-go with my Indiegogo fundraiser.

1. Michele Larocque is a photographer, writer, poet, and visionary. She is a friend, too. She is creating a trailer for my fundraiser at Indiegogo, and it's in its final stages. You can find her on Facebook.
2. When I was asked to find some music for that trailer, I reached out to my local musician friends. Within 24 hours, neighbor Michael Smith came up with an original track that he's modifying now to fit the trailer. I'm so blessed, because Michael, too, is a visionary and a talented musician. He teaches ukulele, but he's adept at any stringed instrument. He doesn't have a site I can point to; but, if you're a local I can provide you with his number if you want lessons.

The wonderful thing about my Indiegogo campaign is this: Other artists now are supporting me, and I'm thrilled beyond words. My gratitude is tangible...

• I'm mentioning Lynn Tincher again not only because she was a generous donor to my Indiegogo campaign, but because she's also involved in a project that is making tracks. She's creating a film from her first novel, Afterthoughts, and she's having great success with this endeavor. Please support her.
• I met another donor to my campaign, Pearl Ketover Prilik, at Robert Brewer's Poetic Asides, where we've been writing poems side-by-side for a few years now. I taught Pearl how to make a heart with ascii type, and she's been a devoted heart fan since that lesson.
• Speaking of Robert Lee Brewer, he generously offered to be a reference for my applications to writer retreats, and you can purchase his latest poetry, Solving the World's Problems, at Amazon. Michael Dwayne Smith from Mojave River Press & Review also stepped up to offer a reference, as did Kim Michele Richardson (another local), author of The Unbreakable Child and columnist at Huffington Post. Other people who offered their support include Jay Sizemore, author of Father Figures, and Sheri Wright -- a woman who offers a bagful of talent in photography, poetry, writing, and now in documentaries.
• Other donors to my campaign include Penny, who makes jewelry from mushrooms (how creative is THAT), and sells at local markets in Virginia. Another donor, who wishes to remain anonymous, also is a writer and a poet. Yet another donor, Diane, writes AND edits, and she helped me tremendously with the copy on my campaign as well as donated to my cause.

I'm blessed to be surrounded by such giving and creative people, and I haven't even tapped the surface of my well of creative friends. I am VERY blessed. If these individuals have faith in me, then you can have faith in me, too. Visit Cancer, Caregiving, and Contentious Love at Indiegogo.

How about you? Do you create? Do you support creators?

Off to a Great Start

It's been a hectic week with tons of tasks on my plate, but I'm off to a great start. Outside tending to mom's garden beds and working, I'm also helping dad to downsize his household. That's not an easy task, since mom and dad were married for 60 years. Fortunately, they moved several times, so mom downsized a bit every time they moved. That helped.

Also, I made the nerve-wracking decision to start my Indiegogo funding campaign to pay an editor and to find time to finish the book. The editing will take a good portion of the funds I'm asking for in this effort. This campaign was a month in the making, and I wrung my hands several times over whether or not to do it. But, I firmly believe in what I'm doing. A friend shared this quote last night, and it resonated with me:

"I think one of the big things that holds people back is the sense that they don’t have time to give everything, so what they have to give is not enough. It’s enough. It’s more than enough when you’re willing to give anything."*

I'm willing to give it all, truly. I feel as though my mother and I have partnered happily for the first time in my life as I continue to tell her story about her death and dying.

I'm happy that a few friends so far have trusted me enough to help me in this effort financially -- what a great start! I'm also very, very happy that a few friends have shared this fundraising page among their friends and readers (many of my friends also are published authors). As a result, over one hundred people almost two hundred people have viewed this campaign in the first two three days. Those shares and visits, as well as the initial funds, have helped to keep my efforts on Indiegogo's "trending" front page for a few days.

Please consider helping to keep me on that front page by sharing this effort or by donating at least $5 for a sample of my writing. Maybe, after you read a few pages, you'll believe in this effort, too.

The black and white image is of mom in 1951. The smaller image is of Mom and me the week before she died, May 31, 2014. I wrote the poem in April 2014.

* Thanks, again, to Mara Eve Robbins.

Taking the Leap, Counting on Friends and Strangers

Mom in 1945. The risk-taker.

This is a very nerve-wracking day for me. I made the decision to go "live" with a fundraising effort that, I hope, will help me finish my book about my experiences with mom and her fatal cholangiocarcinoma (bile duct cancer).

I shared my experiences since day one with my Facebook friends, but that's a safe environment. In fact, it's so safe that I've made many new friends through old friends during this experience, and most of those new friends are cancer patients or caregivers.

I draw strength from all my friends, but it's time to expand that circle. I'll tell you why -- it's because those new Facebook friends have become some of my best supporters and sources of information. So, in expanding my circle to include new readers and supporters, I hope to get AND give back even more.

This society is geared to accept a doctor's prognosis and remedies without question many times. My mother was like that. She rarely asked questions and she never advocated for herself, even though she considered herself a risk-taker. But, after living through her experiences, I had to question why the focus is often on experimental "cures" rather than preventive care. I don't have the answer as to how a person might find out how to detect bile duct cancer or any other chronic disease before it's too late. But, I intend to find out.

I also intend to learn how caregiving can become more effective. When I learned about mom's disease and prognosis, I had little time among mom's doctor visits, caretaking, and taking care of my own business to learn how to take care of myself. I learned how to take care of mom through her doctor visits, and even then directions were fuzzy. I did learn enough to teach mom's home health care and hospice nurses how to take care of mom, since mom's disease still remains on the rare side.

That's a heck of a lot of responsibility for someone who knew nothing about chemo, let along vacuum bottles or heparin.

Although my journey with mom was a fulfilling and strengthening experience for me, it also represented many losses. This is one opportunity I don't intend to lose. I need time to finish this book, and I need your help in this goal. Your gift can help me give back to people who may not even know they need my information yet.

Let's get this show on the road. You can learn more at my Indiegogo fundraising site.

PS -- stay tuned. I have a lot of great gifts and surprises coming from some great individuals in my "team."